On Facebook, there is a freedom of expression. You can express how happy you are, how ill-fated you are, how bad your date was and how drunk you are. You can post a message to solicit for funds and you can bring world peace via mark Zuckerberg’s creation.


Here are the top Facebook statuses that talk about technology, advices, relationships and the world. to the owners of these statuses, thank you for making the world a happier place to live in.

Say something about technology: 

“Teaching your own mother how to use Facebook is like willingly signing with your own death warrant”

“Want to merge MySpace, Facebook, Youtube and Twitter and call it: MYFACEYOUTWEET”

“Dance like no one’s going to put it on Youtube.”

“Insert coin to view my status message.”

“Remembering the day when blackberry and apple were just fruit.”

“I’ve always wondered if film directors wake up screaming “CUT! CUT CUUUUT” when they have nightmares.”

Share an advice as if you were Oprah:

“People say that love is in every corner…gosh! Maybe, I’m moving in circles..”

“Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have the shoes.”

“Best friends listen to what you don’t say.”

“Never judge a book by its cover. She uses the the paragraph on the back, it tells you what the story is about.”

“If someone offers you an lifetime supply of candy and there is just one piece, don’t eat: It’s probably a poison.”

“We have so much in common. You want to travel, I want you to go.”

Relationships reach Facebook: 

“One day your price will come. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost and too stubborn to ask for directions.”

“My wife said I’m too immature and if I don’t grow up it’s going to erect a barrier between us. Ha ha ha, erect.”

“Make love, not war. Hell do both. Get married.”

“Marriage is a sort of friendship recognized by the police.”

“All men are born free and equal. If they go and get married, that’s their own fault.”

Others just want to adore themselves and define the world:

“Wanted to kill the sexiest person alive…But suicide’s a crime.”

“WARNING: Objects in mirror are fatter than they appear.”

“Statistically, 132% of all people exaggerate.”

“Doctors’ waiting room needs some music. And better lighting. And more women. And a pole in the middle of the room. And a buffet.

“Yes, I know how to shut up. I just don’t know when.”

“Alcohol does NOT make you fat. it makes you lean…against table, chairs, walls, floors and…Ugly people!!!”

“What has two ears and can’t hear—->GRANDPA”

“I swear my pillow could be a hairstylist. I always wake up with the weirdest hairdos.”